What is your first impression upon reading this sign?
What “fears” do you have?
Don’t tell me you are afraid of spiders.
That’s not what I am talking about.
 My recent announcement of the possibility of  DBS surgery occurring in the near future has brought on many inquiries as to my level of fear.  There should be a “fear schedule” not unlike the “pain scale” at the doctors office.  The FEAR schedule would be  based on a emotional and physiological state.  When we arrive the med tech taking our vital signs would say “Rate your fear today on a  scale of 1-10, with 1 being  there are no physiological manifestations to 10 where you are so scared you might just pee your panties.”  I would tell the Dr’s office folks that I am not a 10 in fear and they would be most happy they don’t have to call  building maintenance for a “clean up in exam rm 4”.    
Two years ago we planned to do some long distance bicycling riding.  Most everyone I spoke “tospotry abpout a bike wreck, if sine ibe”   
I saved the above line because Charlie watched me type it in  my sleep.  Not too bad huh?  
Now I am awake, lets try this again.   Most everyone I spoke with about the rides we planned to do made comments about the dangers of bicycling.  Everyone had a story of someone getting injured or worse on a  bike.  I needed to have the sign nearby to let others know that I don’t want or need to hear those stories.  Distance cycling when you have a degenerative neurological disease can be scary enough without visions of bicycle spokes spewed across the highway.
The mention of Deep Brain Stimulation Therapy seems  to bring up fears in all the people who ARE NOT going to experience it. There have been more comments if “how scary” than I can count. I could  not be more excited about this procedure. !  The idea of improving my mobility is so awesome!  My fascination with all things medical both helps and frustrates me.  I would love to be in the gallery at the surgical suite to ask questions as they came up.  But I really think the surgical team will do a great job without interruptions from me.  
Out walking this dreary afternoon I told Ellen about the DBS procedure.  Her response  “Cool!”.

Perfect Ellen.  You followed the directions on the sign. 

  Acknowledge, comment, agree with, encourage. 

Just please help me out.

Don’t feed the fears.

One response to “PLEASE DO NOT FEED THE…”

  1. I'm so glad you are sharing this journey with us. I. too, think it is exciting and I'd like to think if I were in your position I'd be brave enough to try it. If I ever try to tell you a horror story, just tell me to shut up! Hang in there.

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